Last night all of a sudden I was asked about my school holidays and realised my dad was planning a holiday and hes been back what? 3 days? Yeah, left like 2 months ago.
Well its his home country and of course why would you want to live in a completly different country where everything is seen from a different cultural aspect?
Especially it being England, its hard, I understand why my dad wants to go back.
But something I didn't expect him to mention was a trip 'Europe trip' okay thats great I mean I have always wanted to explore the world but on my own. Or with a friend.
I don't know but my dad was saying how about a trip to europe if I didn't want to go with him to his home country but somewhere with my mum and sisters, I didn't want that, I think I'll save the world tour trip for when I'm in university, hopefully I will get in of course.
Lately I have been proper stressed out, I don't think I am studying as much which is really bring me down but I have nothing and need to really stop being so lazy!!
Ugh its these Japanese shows I'd go on the laptop and say 'Oh yeah let me watch one episode and I'll do some studying then' but end up wasting my whole computer time because my laptop is big fat pile of crap that shuts down when I try to complete one episode!!!!
If you want to acheive anything then studing is essential and I'll be sure to hope my sister does well and not make the same mistake like I did in my first year in GCSE's this is my second and why do I have a feeling I'll be doing another year of GCSE's??
Failure, I am.
Sucks big time and I am trying its just I think I am become more stressed out, my hairs falling out!! Joke about the hair lol. But yeah I am stressed.
As mentioned about my shyness oh my gosh!! I cannot be heard in my own classroom!
AH. Im a quiet person and when I try and give my answers I get overspoken by someone else so that noone can hear me!! That annoyed me.
Friday, 14 May 2010
Monday, 3 May 2010
Confidence *sigh*
I wish I had the confidence I have now.
When I was younger I was a really shy kid and I hated myself for it, even being around my over big family I was a very shy kid, sat at the back, didn't join in anything, didn't say anything unless it was to my sisters or parents.
I'm sure things would have changed dramatically if I had the confidence back then.
When I started primary school, reception, which was the first year of the school.
I was a very quiet kid, I never spoke to anyone and when I needed to speak to the teacher, I whispered in their ear. When you don't have the confidence, you didn't have many friends.
I could still remember myself by myself at lunch times walking around in circles, ugh I hate myself for not doing anything about it, yet its my parents fault too for not getting me involved in any outside of school activities.
I think I should mention that I did make friends eventually who were great and no I was never bullied.
It makes me miserable to think I didn't have confidence unlike all my cousins who had plenty, I had zilch. I hate myself for it.
Course now, I have more confidence than I have ever had before, not afraid to say anything anymore, that I'd have to thank my friends, if you can't be wild with your friends, who can you be wild with?
But not that much that I could do anything drastic, I know somewhere inside me is still that shy 6 year old.
Even though I'm too young to think about it but I did remember saying to myself 'When I have kids, I'll make sure they don't turn out shy like I was'
One of the key things in life is confidence, if you have that, you'll go far and I know it.
When I was younger I was a really shy kid and I hated myself for it, even being around my over big family I was a very shy kid, sat at the back, didn't join in anything, didn't say anything unless it was to my sisters or parents.
I'm sure things would have changed dramatically if I had the confidence back then.
When I started primary school, reception, which was the first year of the school.
I was a very quiet kid, I never spoke to anyone and when I needed to speak to the teacher, I whispered in their ear. When you don't have the confidence, you didn't have many friends.
I could still remember myself by myself at lunch times walking around in circles, ugh I hate myself for not doing anything about it, yet its my parents fault too for not getting me involved in any outside of school activities.
I think I should mention that I did make friends eventually who were great and no I was never bullied.
It makes me miserable to think I didn't have confidence unlike all my cousins who had plenty, I had zilch. I hate myself for it.
Course now, I have more confidence than I have ever had before, not afraid to say anything anymore, that I'd have to thank my friends, if you can't be wild with your friends, who can you be wild with?
But not that much that I could do anything drastic, I know somewhere inside me is still that shy 6 year old.
Even though I'm too young to think about it but I did remember saying to myself 'When I have kids, I'll make sure they don't turn out shy like I was'
One of the key things in life is confidence, if you have that, you'll go far and I know it.
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